Black and navy, black and brown – we’ve all been there
Remember the days when you could rock up to a wedding in your work suit? Most of the guys at the wedding would be doing the same thing. But the times, they are a’ changin’.
Always a little late to the party, menswear in Ireland has been slow to adapt. But with the likes of Mc Gregor, Paul Galvin and Darren Kennedy showing it’s cool to be well-dressed, now is not the time to slack.
So, without further ado, here are the nine biggest mistakes Irish men make at weddings.
Take notes lads.
Black suit and brown shoes
If you don’t understand this, all we can say is: don’t question it. It’s a colour combo that Does Not Work. It's practically bordering on offensive. And YES - that means you need to invest in a new pair of shoes.
The only way brown shoes will work is if you’re willing to wear an all-brown velvet suit with matching brown polo-neck (ala The Man From UNCLE) and we’re not sure the Irish man is quite ready for that look yet. It’s all-black, black and grey, all-brown or brown and grey.
Shirt and no tie
Unless you have the style chops of Pharrell and you’re dripping head-to-toe Gucci and custom brogues, a shirt without a tie is an absolute no-no at a wedding.
It basically says you couldn’t be bothered. Plus, the tie (and socks – see below) are the two best expressions of personal style you can have at a wedding. Why forsake that opportunity?
You might get away with pulling a shirt out of the washing machine/ from under your bed/ sports bag and rock into the office. But hang your head in shame if you attempt the same at a wedding.
And if you don’t know how to tie a tie properly, sit yourself in the bold corner and get familiar with You Tube tutorials. It’s not cool to look like a door-to-door salesman anymore.
The goal here is to have a sharp, pressed and crisp shirt and the perfectly knotted tie/ bow-tie to set it off.
Trousers that are too baggy/ too short/ too long
For God’s sake, go to a tailor would you? Any of the above conjures up secondary school vibes and you’ll run the risk of a teacher popping up out of somewhere to send you to detention for a “sloppy” uniform. Tailored trousers are the difference between a boy and a man.
If you don’t know that the socketh maketh the man then you don’t even deserve to be at the wedding. And if you think a natty old pair of black ones will do, you’re gravely mistaken. Socks are where you can absolutely shine.
Here you can have fun with prints and colour – although we strongly recommend the socks fit in with the overall “theme” or colour of the suit - so bright pinks, oversized polka dots or zany zigzags that fit with your general colour palette are all welcome.
Socks from €2.99
This is the Commitments circa 1991 and not to be seen anywhere near a 2017 wedding circuit. Obviously black tie rules can involve a cummerbund and one can look like a damn fine James Bond. But unless you are extremely confident, you risk looking like a Prom King.
A “kerazzzy” print
A Hawaiian print shirt? A tie with parrots? A little Pat Sharp, a little Elton John? Unless you’re either of these, save the snazzy prints for Halloween. Or the Christmas party. Or better yet, retire them.
Unkempt hair (including facial hair)
The only way unkempt hair works today is it if it studiously so. That means: if it looks unkempt after an hour of styling. Otherwise, yes you need to get a trim before the wedding. And ABSOLUTELY yes, you need to shave the morning of the wedding.
With male grooming being such a huge industry, you’ve absolutely no excuse not to get a hot towel shave before the big day. Plus, it’s a bloody good experience.
Open shirt with/ without chest hair
Are you a cast member of Made In Chelsea? Have you been invited to one of their weddings? If so, feel free to leave your ripped, sun-kissed chest on show. Otherwise, put it away. And wrap a tie around it.
So there you have it - the nine mortal sins of wedding season. You've been warned!