Guilty? These Are the Biggest Mistakes Every Groom Makes

by Peter Dolan


And how to avoid them

From selective invites that offend the in-laws to choosing a worse than dodgy DJ (you had one job) – being a groom can conjure up a whole host of potential disasters.

The journey to 'I do' isn't always smooth sailing and, unfortunately, doesn't quickly forgive rookie mistakes.

Yes, it may be your first time up the aisle, but your bride won't much care about that if the flower arrangements are wrong and you cannot tell the difference between ivory and off white.

Before you're in too deep and the monotony of choosing yet another gluten-free, dairy-free, paleo starter option inspires you to call the whole thing off, take a second to sit back and breathe.

You're not alone. Not at all. In fact, thousands of grooms are making the same silly mistakes as you are every day.

That still doesn't make it okay though. Your future wife will not see it this way, nor should she. So after you've taken a few moments, take a few more and behold the comprehensive guide on how to navigate your nuptials.


Not showing enthusiasm

Do your eyes glaze over at the mere mention of wedding plans? Do you find yourself repeating the phrase ‘yes, whatever you like’ when discussing colour palettes, centre pieces and, heaven forbid, napkin folds? These are all classic symptoms of an absentee groom.

Physically you may be there, but mentally? You're replaying the highlights of last night's match. And that's just not on.

Showing little to no enthusiasm is the biggest pre-wedding mistake every man makes. Guaranteed to cause extreme irritation in your better half, this is one of the main reasons couples argue during the crucial planning stages of their big day.

While the likes of place settings and wedding favours may not be your thing, your fiance is, so do yourself a favour; act perky, display interest, and, above all else, share your opinion!


Underestimating the full cost of a wedding

Irish couples spend an average of €25,000 on their wedding. From the venue and the band, to the suit and the dress, the expenses will begin to roll in thick and fast.

Be realistic from the outset, yes this is your 'big day' but you'll have a whole load of other days to follow and it would be assumed that you don't want those days to be fueled by beans and toast.

Establish a clear budget which allocates funds according to priority. Spreadsheets are a fantastic way to manage and keep track of your spends.

Don’t be afraid to shop around for quotes and negotiate with vendors during your initial meetings. Little savings can go a long way in the future.


Choosing the worst best man

Contrary to popular belief, being a best man is not all birds and booze. It can be a tough gig. The long list of duties and special responsibilities require a certain calibre of man, i.e. someone with a bit of cop on.

Yes your lifelong best buddy may be mighty craic on a night out, but those skills aren't always transferable to doing something as important as, say, minding the rings.

Choose wisely and take into consideration which friend or relation boasts the best characteristics for the role. Reliability and good organisational skills are key requirements.

Aside from being a guardian of the one ring to rule them all, he must keep the other groomsmen in line, liaise with suppliers on the day, and know you and your partner’s relationship well enough to give an epic yet touching speech. No pressure so.


Going with the get-up flow

These days when it comes to picking your wedding attire, it’s all about injecting some personality into your look. While this in no way means that jeans are on the agenda, gone are the days of strict rules and compulsory three-piece garments.

The modern groom is spoiled for choice. Slim fit suits are the order of the day for a city slicker, while tweed is totally on-trend for rugged countryside affairs. Have fun with it and trust in a suit expert like Spirit to show you the way.


Overindulging on the prenuptial pints

Simple but effective, put in place a strict alcohol limit the night before your nuptials. This is where you'll need a trusty best man to step in and be a watcher of the pints, wines and whiskey.

It may all seem like fun and games at the time, but beginning married life with a raging hangover does not make for a happily ever after.


Being too stag-centric.

We get it. Your entire life has been building up to this precise moment – the stag party. While a four-day session in the sun may be your idea of living the dream, that doesn’t mean everyone else will want to hear about your shenanigans.

If you find yourself making the stag your main priority, pause and take some time to reflect. Your vows and commitment to your future spouse should rank much higher and should be the main topic of conversation 95% of the time.


Getting a bazzer (you idiot)

Sweet baby Jesus. The week of your wedding is not the time to trial a new hairstyle. Greeting your partner at the top of the aisle sporting a Jimmy Neutron-style quiff will not go down well.

Remember, your wedding photos last a lifetime. Ensure that you stick to what you know (and what your bride likes) when executing your pre-wedding grooming routine.


Playing it loose with the little details

Earn some serious brownie points by paying attention to the finer details. From a thoughtful gift and handwritten love letter to the bride on the morning of, to shaking the father-of-the-bride’s hand at the top of the aisle, these sentimental gestures won’t go unnoticed.



You won't just look like an ass but you'll get into a lot of trouble too. So just don't do it.

Don’t assume the bride will arrive fashionably late to the wedding ceremony. While it is her prerogative, the chances are she could arrive on time due to sheer excitement. So be on time and maybe give that sneaky pub pitstop a miss.